WWW readers Alice and Ray held their November wedding in the village of Alfriston, East Sussex. They had a traditional church ceremony followed by a cosy pub reception.
They had 3 months to plan their day and opted for a mid week date within a budget of £5200. They home-made much of their décor, with rustic map and book details which looked super lovely.
I love the vintage feel rose bouquet, the delicious looking cake table and sweet personal touches Alice tells us all about in her wedding report.
Thanks so much to the brilliant Sara Reeve for sharing her photographs with us.
The Proposal… Ray and I had been best friends for years, and met at primary school. Everyone who knew us both kept banging their heads against walls because they were so certain that we should be together. Each of us denied this strongly, we were Just Friends. When we eventually took the next step around Easter 2013, it didn’t take us long to realise that (a little annoyingly) everyone was right and we were meant to be together. Suddenly we felt like ‘Ahh, so THIS is how it’s meant to be..’ and then we discussed the possibility of marriage. I mentioned that if I ever got married (which, incidentally, I never wanted), then I’d like to get married on my dad’s birthday as he had passed away in 2012, and it went from there really. The seed was planted but I never truly thought he would ever propose as he had also never wanted to be married. In August he took me to my favourite place in the whole world – the Cuckmere Valley, where we frequently took visitors or went for walks. I thought he was acting a little strangely, not as relaxed as he usually is, and he was very insistent that I should lie in the sun and enjoy. Anyway, he eventually said that he felt bad about making me wait so long for him to propose and pulled me up to face him, where he was down on one knee holding out an open box. It was quite funny because it was such a lovely day, and he’d been so keen to make sure that I was relaxed that I was actually a bit sleepy and it took me a moment to figure out what was happening. He had taken us quite far up the bank of the valley so that I could have my favourite view in the world behind me as he asked me to marry him. Of course I said yes, and virtually no sooner had this happened but it started raining so we beat a hasty retreat to the car! The date was set and somewhat poetically it would have been my dad’s 80th birthday had he still been with us.
The Vision for the Day… Strangely, although neither of us had truly ever wanted to get married, our vision very quickly materialised. We had to be realistic because our wedding was going to be in three months time. Being so similar we both wanted something small, personal, cosy and laid back and it was perfect because everything I was imagining, he was too, and vice versa.
The Planning Process… We had to make some very quick decisions. It helped that we had an idea of what we wanted, and because it was a mid-week wedding it meant that we could focus on the actual wedding day and think about a party afterwards. The first thing we did was decide whether we wanted a church or a registry office wedding. Ray didn’t like the idea of marrying somewhere we’d be unable to re-visit but I was terrified of the idea of walking down an aisle. We had decided to try and have the reception in the village I work in, Alfriston, and there is such a lovely church there that we went to visit and realised as soon as walking in that it would be perfect. It is a beautiful, but fairly small church (with approximately twenty steps down the aisle – I counted!). It had the bonus of being in the village which would prevent our guests having to drive around on the day, and was also part of the community that I serve. We had problems because the church wasn’t in our parish, and only three months until the wedding, but luckily I have an aunt in the village who allowed me the required month stay with her so that my address was registered within the parish for the legal purposes of the church. We had meetings with local restaurants to see whether they could put on the sort of reception we had in mind. We put our heads together with family to think about guest lists and decorations and a suitable menu. We started gathering material that would be used for hand-making decorations and I was on the internet during lunch break hunting for photographers and ideas. Having never been fussed by weddings before, I suddenly couldn’t get enough of researching other people’s weddings! We had arts and crafts days where our bridesmaid and her now fiancé, my sister-in-law to be and a close school friend all made things for the big day such as table decorations, the buttonholes, the orders of service and table names. We thought carefully about how we could involve everyone in the day – I have three elder brothers and wanted no one to feel overlooked. It was soon settled that my eldest brother would give me away, my second brother would do a reading and my third brother would drive me to the church, which was perfect because his number plate is personalised with our family name, as far as is possible with personalised plates!
Budget… For us, as the wedding was unplanned, we hadn’t been saving towards it like a lot of couples would usually have. By the end of it our estimated total spend was around £5200.
The Venue… We chose the beautiful St Andrew’s Church on The Tye in Alfriston village, followed by a reception at The George Inn, only a few minutes walk from the church. The George is a local pub and restaurant with a fantastic reputation, and was just what we were looking for – cosy and intimate, with quality, wholesome English winter food. It has low beams and open fireplaces, twinkle lights and comfortable leather sofas. Cate, the proprietor, was on hand to offer advice and help at each step. Our choice of menu was kept simple but wholesome with homemade tomato soup and crusty bread or garlic mushrooms with toasted ciabatta to start, followed by homemade chicken pie with roasted veg and mash or macaroni cheese with roasted tomato and garlic bread for main, followed by a selection of the cakes of our choice for dessert with tea and coffee.
The Dress + Accessories… The dress came from a local bridal shop, Exquisite You, in Seaford East Sussex. It was a D’Zage dress. Because I had limited time I had to order ‘off the rack’ as I would not have the required six months for one to be made for me. This obviously made my choice a lot harder, as my options were limited to what was already in the shop that fitted with minimal adjustments. The shoes I ordered were by Rachel Simpson and were just stunning and so comfortable. They are handmade in Spain and the ones I went for in the end had an elegant, vintage style. The veil came from the same bridal store as my dress and was a very simple affair which was mid-length and had a handful of simple diamantes around the hems – I didn’t want a tiara as I didn’t want to look too ‘done’ or excessively ‘blingy’. My mum chose my earrings – they were from the Buckingham Palace store and replicas of Catherine’s Royal Wedding earrings which was a nod towards the memory of mum and I camping in London for the Royal Wedding. Hair was done by my sister-in-law Emma, and Dior make-up was used by a representative of theirs called Rebecca.
Finding the Dress… Mum and I took two trips for wedding dress shopping. I had an idea in my mind what I was looking for – I had been browsing online and was considering the option of ordering from abroad but just couldn’t bring myself to take that risk so close to the wedding date. I tried on around ten dresses – none of them did anything for me. I was certain that I wanted sleeves, and I kept being told that designers didn’t bother with sleeves because they are tricky to ‘get right’. Nonetheless, I hate my arms and wanted sleeves! The hunt continued. I was tugged into puffball dresses, squeezed into mermaid tail dresses and stuffed into strapless dresses and I kept hating the sight of so much skin on show. In despair we trudged to the wedding dress shop in my town which I had written off as ‘expensive’. I grabbed an armful of dresses, one of which had a lace attachment on the hanger – this was a last minute choice, and yet as soon as I put it on I felt more comfortable than I had in any of the other dresses. I personally felt at ease, held in nicely and modestly covered. It wasn’t too flouncy, it wasn’t too glittery, and it was cheaper than many of the other elaborate designs I had been trying. I was one of those women who knew as soon as I put it on that it was the dress for me!
Groom’s Attire… Ray does not do suits. A painter and decorator by trade, he did not own a suit before this. Him and his best man had a manly day, doing manly things… including suit shopping. They eventually plumped for a smart, slim cut number from Topman. It wasn’t quite blue, and wasn’t quite grey, but it looked lovely on and can easily be re-worn. At my request, the ties were purchased to try and compliment my bouquet.
The Readings + Music… Our wedding became somewhat traditional without any prior intention! I entered to the gorgeous Pachelbel’s Canon and we exited to The Wedding March. Our hymns were Morning Has Broken (I was told that this hymn was penned in the village – I remain uncertain if that is true) and Jerusalem, and whilst we signed the register we had the choir sing Amazing Grace to entertain the guests. We were very fortunate that our primary school teacher is still in touch with my mum, and he very kindly agreed to be our organist for the service. The readings we chose were Corinthians which was read by my brother and Colossians which was read by a good friend, Sean. As a non-religious reading we asked Ray’s dad to read the lyrics to the song Guaranteed by Eddie Vedder which features in our favourite film – Into The Wild. The song is about a person who no-body in our modern society understands because he is a free spirit and has not found his place in the world yet, but he is happy to travel and explore until he finds somewhere that he really feels is where he belongs. It is a song of a person asking for people to accept him for who he is, and how he chooses to live his life, because everyone is different and chooses different paths to walk down. As keen travellers ourselves, we relate strongly to these lyrics.
Beautiful Bridesmaids… There was only one clear choice for me when it came to a bridesmaid. My friend since secondary school, my travel companion on occasions, my former flatmate and honorary sister, Dawn. She is a consistent friend, someone who is there to celebrate the ups and be with me during the downs. I have other friends who I consider close, but to me having more than one would have taken something away from how special Dawn is to me. It was a personal thank you for everything she has done for me.
The Flowers… I knew straight away that I would like something classic, timeless and personal. Roses were the perfect choice – my dad used to grow beautiful, fragrant roses in his garden, and they are available in so many different colours that I knew I’d find something just right. I went to two florists – the first of which produced a giant lever arch folder of dusty photographs that appeared to have been taken sometime in the 80s. Then I went to see Helen at Church Lane Flowers and my goodness, she was such a breath of fresh air! Fresh and quirky, bubbly and tucked away in a cute little shop. Helen listened to me, knew exactly what I was thinking and sent me away with the names of two roses to research. These were the stunning Amnesia rose and the Majolica White spray rose. As soon as I Google imaged them, it was sold to me. They were perfect! I didn’t want a giant, fussy bouquet. I like simplicity and quality and Helen managed to pull off exactly what I was hoping she would!
The Cake… My mum manages Badgers tea room in Alfriston. She is an exquisite cake maker. Of course we wanted her to make the cake. Only, we didn’t actually want a tiered cake, we wanted a selection of what she does best – homemade, traditional sponges. She excelled herself, up early on the day of the wedding and preparing for the day. In the end we had a small, square traditional wedding cake, a coffee sponge, a chocolate sponge, a lemon drizzle, an apple and sultana and a fresh cream Victoria. A little something for all tastes!
Your Photographer… I was keen to splurge on a photographer. Ray was less so, and I quote – ‘But everyone has an iPhone these days..’ I ignored this and continued to browse online, poring over profile after profile. In my mind I was looking for someone with a little bit of quirk, a fresh look, nothing too staged but nothing too informal either. I landed on Sara Reeve’s website and immediately thought ‘bingo!’. I coerced Ray into looking too, and soon enough we were sat at Sara’s table drinking tea and looking at albums whilst a cat with one eye wandered around by our feet. I was sold! I sat for around twenty minutes wondering what I could promise Ray to make him agree to hiring Sara, and did not expect to hear him say as soon as her front door was closed ‘She’s brilliant, we’re having her if she is available’. Ray is self-employed and had been impressed by the detail and effort that Sara had gone to before even meeting us. I guess he knows what to look for because he has to sell himself each time he enters a potential clients home for a quote. We had our photographer and she didn’t disappoint!
The Details + Decor… We think that it was the little details that made our weddings ‘ours’. The two things in our life that we love the most are travel, and reading. Despite saying that our wedding didn’t have a theme, it became quite obvious that books and maps took centre stage. We didn’t want buttonholes or table flowers so we decided to have buttonholes made from book pages instead – these were taken care of by Dawn and a few others (such as myself) who took care of the simple parts such as the cutting of the book pages into suitable shapes to make flowers. Table flowers were made the same way. Ray and I love the beach, we used stones from our local beach to paint our table names on – our table names were the names of places we have visited that were special to us in some way. Our orders of service were not the usual A4 print outs, but carefully handmade using an old World Atlas, good quality paper and a lovely jute string bow. Actually, the jute was used throughout the day – it was used to tie the bouquets and to decorate the jam jars that we had placed around the room with tea lights in, it was used on the book page confetti cones and to hang decorations of map hearts in the windows, it was used to hang quotes about love and travel and it was used to tie book page hearts on the ends of each pew in church. Such a simple thing, but it gave us consistency and looked rustic, natural and neutral. We were allowed to toast marshmallows on sticks on the open fire – this was good fun for the children. Ray had gone to the dog racing for his stag do – so to continue to gambling theme we took bets on the day as to how long the Best Man’s speech would be – this kept people interested and got everyone involved. Plus, someone would win a nice bit of cash! Around where the cakes were displayed we had printed off lots of photos of Ray and I and had made some decoupage letters, spelling LOVE which were free standing and could have the photos displayed around.
The Honeymoon… For two people who love travel it was pretty tricky to find somewhere that we could go at relatively short notice and that neither of us have been to. I only had a few days holiday left at work, so it was decided that a short, romantic city break in Europe would be perfect. In the end, the choice was Prague, and we were both shocked that such an obvious city to visit was one that neither one of us had been to. We stayed at the quirky Hotel Fusion in their Love themed room and had a wonderful trip with brilliant dining and sightseeing.
Memorable Moments… Waking up, at the end of November, and seeing bright blue skies from my window was incredible – we were so lucky with the weather! My mum’s boss owns a big house in the village and allowed myself and my family to use it to get ready in. I have lots of family who live abroad, so to wake up on the morning of my wedding and have my mum and her husband, Dawn and her partner Simon, brothers, sisters-in-law, nieces and nephews with me was truly special. Having a photo of my dad (taken at my brother’s wedding) stuffed down the back of my dress to ensure that ‘dad has your back’. Whilst going to the car on foot I was waved at and tooted at by several happy passers by, and indeed some late arriving guests (!). Arriving at church and seeing Ray stood with his back to me at the front of the church. My brother taking my arm to begin the walk down the aisle – his last words being ‘My, you really smell of vodka’. Reaching Ray at the end of the aisle, our relieved smile and hand squeeze of support. Managing not to get any of our vows wrong, and getting up and down the aisle without tripping over. The confetti which was dumped on us by the bucket load. Switching to welly boots to begin our photo-shoot and then on arrival at The George seeing so many friends and smiling family members was really just perfect. There were a few lovely moments when some of our football-loving guests realised that the pies they had carefully chosen for their dinner had been initialled with mine and Ray’s football club letters, which needless to say was not THEIR favourite football club!
Advice for Other Couples… Get as many people involved as you can. We felt that by asking for help and getting our closest friends and family involved that it made the day more personal not just for us, but for our guests too. Plus, it was so helpful because things got done far quicker than if it had been Ray and I alone. Try and make some of the decorations too, we made all the little paper hearts that were used as table decorations by buying a heart cut-out stamp and lots of old maps from second hand book stores – yet we saw bags of the same thing on sale online for ridiculous amounts. It was such a joy to see all the visions we had come together on the big day! Really try to savour the experience of planning too, because I am the least artistic person I know and actually, I had so much fun coming up with ideas that now it’s all over, that’s it! One last thing – I drove past the wedding dress shop recently, and looked in the window and felt a strange feeling at the thought that you only get the chance to go wedding dress shopping once in your whole life (that’s the plan, right?) so therefore, have fun when you’re trying your dresses on. Make an event of it and be silly, try outrageous designs on because that’s your one chance to try all those dresses on that you look at in the window when you walk past a bridal store!
Credit Where Credit is Due…
Photographer | Sara Reeve
Wedding Dress | Exquisite You
Shoes | Rachel Simpson
Cake | Badgers Tea House
Venue | The George
Flowers | Church Lane Flowers
Oh such a delightful day.
Thanks so much to Alice and Ray for sharing their beautiful wedding with us XOXO Lou